Parental ‘Provisioning’ in an increasingly busy and demanding world.

If its too Drake, you’re too old..

You know you are in touch with your children when you enjoy Kendrick Lamar's "Money Tree" and Billy Joel's "Piano Man" in equal measure. It's the ultimate clash of Worlds, old and new. And lately it's sent a tsunami of fun hitting the shores of Chez Gomera!

We are a regular crowd. Lost in the diaspora. Sunday roast at the local village pub. Dreams of a prosperous Zimbabwe. Spending too much time on what's app. Over-worked. And of course we want to meet Obama. And the Queen. And Kim Kardashian.

Lonely. Unrewarding. And tough, it would've been had it not been for family. And friends. And the children... And Children! Wow! These gems of creation have been one great gift and experience!

Watching the kids grow has been special. Spending time with the kids has been extremely rewarding. Lois and I have missed some children-moments, in pursuit of ambition. And like most parents our age, have quickly and painfully learnt that our ambition cannot compensate for what we displace: childhood, a lovely summer, and family.

The girls need for dad's faithful love - one that does not change with moods. Taku's (our son) need for us to have faith in him when he has lost it in himself. Not surprising perhaps, but often overlooked in the daily struggle for parental 'provisioning.'

If there is one lesson to share, it's that children need us to navigate by, to learn how to ride the waves of big storms, to navigate their lives: and good parenting requires investment in our pioneering skills.

One parent once said to us: "Be absorbed by the moment. Don't lose it!" Those who aim directly for happiness often find it difficult to achieve. Happiness is a by-product of absorption. As such, he reasoned, aim for an absorbing rich life. Identify some worthwhile challenges. Happiness will be a welcome byproduct.  

We've rediscovered our moment of absorption this summer.

Most of what Kendrick Lamar has to say is gibberish in my world. Perhaps even revolting. But the chap has captured the imagination of my children. Together with another equally revolting chap called Drake, they dominate the morning school-run hour in my car.

I’ve discouraged that music genre. Even tried banning it during morning rush, in favor of BBC radio 4 or Billy Joel's sensible 'Piano Man.' But as we have come to learn, the generational clash of music tastes cannot be parented out of existence. As it turns out, if it's too Drake, you r too old!

Resistance is sometimes futile. And misses the moment. So I will take the front row seat and get absorbed by the moment, Piano Man in my mind, watching the Gomera genetic investments navigate their way through childhood...

Max Gomera



06.01.2016 20:15

This is a beautiful piece! Getting absorbed in their childhood moments provide treasured memories.

Rhodah Mafemba

13.12.2015 10:51

Home is where the heart is. Even as Economic Refugees let's thrive to keep it real. The Cultural shock is cancerous so let's instil our norms & values in our future generations (our kid).


25.11.2015 11:11

A really lovely piece, Max

Latest comments

10.08 | 16:04

Continue to rest in peace sekuru

10.08 | 07:11

Till we meet again keep resting in peace sekuru

05.07 | 09:26

Isitshwala, the food of champions! You took me down memory lane with this piece, my friend. And with a smile too!!

21.06 | 10:01

RIP will always be missed

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